I’m just sitting here thinking I probably should write a blog post since it has been 3 weeks since my last post.  I have a few ideas but not sure they really all fit together to make anything that would seem coherent.  So, maybe I’ll just write snippets and random thoughts and see what you think of that approach.

• Studying Brene Brown’s Daring Greatly book in the Thursday morning book group at church.  We watch a video of Brene discussing her concepts and then have group discussion on the points.  Brene says we sacrifice relationships and opportunities and “turn our backs on our gifts” when we try to be perfect and “bulletproof” every time we walk into the “arena”.
  • Love Brene’s style both in her video presentation and her writing.  She is very down-to-earth and relatable.  Not afraid to use everyday, common language to describe things and make her point (e.g., something “pisses” her off; or, something is “crap”).
  • Daring and being vulnerable – the main topics of the book – are very hard concepts for me.  I know I have major issues with these ideas.  I’d rather keep my walls up and not let anyone see I don’t know what I am doing.
  • Vulnerability is feeling disconnected (e.g., no one else is this stupid; no one else would make this kind of mistake).  I like that definition.
  • Stress occurs when your values are being challenged.  Take time to identify your values and it may help you determine why you feel stressed.  Example:  being thorough in your work may be a value – not having enough time to be thorough on a project will cause you stress.
• Somewhere recently, and unfortunately, I can’t remember where, I read of a great approach to take when faced with a task or experience that seems insurmountable – instead of saying “I can’t” say, “How can I?”  Saying “I can’t” is disempowering.
• One of my friends from book group who always has great ideas on how to approach life (Jules, you know who you are!) recently said she goes about considering how to act in situations by asking herself “what is the loving thing to do”.  Great approach.
• We are all more resilient than we think we are, and adversity is a great opportunity for growth.  A good way to learn how capable we are is to find an activity that causes us to feel vulnerable and embrace it, see how it goes.  Scary, right?  One of my scary activities has been taking classes about writing at The Loft.  There I encounter persons who seem to be much better writers than I am; I can feel really inadequate.  But, I have gotten through the classes, learned a lot, and no one has called me stupid!
• I try to remember that no one can get at my safe place – my spirit/ my heart/my uniqueness – which was pure when I came out as a newborn baby, and remains pure today.  Obviously, I have messed up the rest of me in many ways since birth, but that original pureness is still deep inside and safe.  This helps me remember I can act courageously and confidently.

So, this is a mess of a post.  Let me know if any of these points resonates with you and perhaps I can delve deeper in a future post (no promises).  Feel free to leave your comments below.

Follow-up to my previous post about reading my mother-in-law’s Grandparent Book.  See the post here.

I received comments on that post from some of you agreeing it was a good idea to write about your growing up years for the benefit of your offspring, but indicating you didn’t think your life was very interesting.

I shared my disappointment about these comments with my husband.  I countered that just describing everyday life from many years ago would intrigue and interest next generations because everyday life has changed so much over the years.  The world is a very different place than the one we knew as kids.

RC and I then had fun recalling memories of how things were when we were children in the 1950s.  I think it will be obvious to you how these contrast with what children of today experience.

• Gasoline – 25 cents/gallon and an attendant would pump the gas for you while washing your windshield and checking your oil.
• Radio – only AM stations.  If we were lucky, late at night we could sometimes pull in stations from far away.  My favorite memory is being able to listen to WLS which was broadcast from Chicago (I lived in Austin, MN).  Somewhere late in the 50s or early 60s transistor radios were all the rage.  They were small and ran on batteries so could be carried in our pocket wherever we went.
• TV – access to only three network stations – ABC, NBC, CBS.  In fact, we didn’t have a TV in my family until I was about 5 years old.
• Printed matter – manual typewriters.  If we wanted multiple copies of a document we used carbon paper.  Correcting a typo was risky business as we used a special eraser which would rip the paper if we rubbed too vigorously. (How exciting, the day erasable bond paper was developed!)
• Telephones – rotary-dial wall or desk phones.  Long-distance calls were made by dialing 0 for the operator who assisted you; the calls were expensive and if you talked too long you could rack up quite a bill.  Party lines were common so it was not unusual to pick up the receiver to make a call and find the line already in use.  If you were out and about and needed to contact someone, you found a phone booth and paid a dime to make your call.
• Automobiles – no air-conditioning or seat belts.  Car trips on hot summer days involved riding with all the windows down.  Child car seats were either non-existent or some sort of contraption that just hung over the back of the seat.  It was not unusual for small children to ride in the front seat of the car standing next to the driver.  In the event of a quick stop, the driver would just throw their arm out to prevent the child from being thrown forward.
• Microwave ovens – didn’t exist.
• School – filmstrips and chalkboards.  If teachers used a filmstrip to enhance learning, some sort of a beep would indicate when the filmstrip was to be advanced. As students we sometimes had the job of erasing the blackboard at the end of each school day…messy white chalk dust everywhere. 
• Mail – letters written in longhand, and sent in an envelope via snail mail.

This is just a starter list of changes.  If you decide to write down some memories for your children/nieces/nephews to read in the future, perhaps this list will jog your memory.  You could likely elaborate on each of the points above.  I’m quite sure even those of you in the generation after me could write about the many changes that have occurred in your lives.

It would be fun to expand the list above.  If you can provide some memories or more detail for any of the points, I’d love your comments.

Corky weighed 13 lbs when she was born – at home, because a storm made traveling to the hospital over snow-packed rural roads impossible so the doctor was brought to the farmhouse by sleigh and horses; she attended school in a one-room schoolhouse and because only 32 children attended the school, meaning grades had to be combined for the lone teacher’s convenience, she skipped 3rd and 5th grades and did 6th grade twice; her parents thought she would grow up to be a farmer’s wife tending to the household chores and raising children, therefore she only needed to know how to cook, clean and sew, so they didn’t allow her to go to high school…she left school after 8th grade.

These are some of the facts I have learned about my now deceased mother-in-law’s life while typing up the entries she made in The Grandparent Book; a book she received from her granddaughters to record her life story.

The book, which consists of questions about every aspect of a person’s life, provides enough space after each question to allow for responses.  It is designed for grandparents’ use to describe their life so descendants can know their story.

Though I knew my mother-in-law for over 40 years, I learned lots of things about her while doing this transcribing of her long-hand notes, that I never knew before.

How very interesting!

It was rather like reading a history book about life on a farm in rural Minnesota during the 1920s and 1930s.

So, why was I typing all this information that Corky had written into this book long-hand?

There are four grandchildren, and in fact, now four great-grandchildren with another on the way; and, there is only one Grandparent Book.  Daughter, Amy, and I decided it would be nice for all of the heirs – sons also – to have at least an electronic copy of Grandma’s story.  Since the book is bound, photocopying would be cumbersome, so Amy elected me to work on typing a copy in a computer file for sharing with everyone interested in having one.  Once I have completed the transcribing, I will be distributing a copy to family members.

Just coincidentally, Amy gave me The Grandparent Book several years ago when her first-born, Jack, was a baby.  The assumption, of course, being that I would write down my life story.  To date, I haven’t written a thing in the book.  Now, after seeing how much enjoyment one can get from reading about the life of one’s elders, I intend to sit down and begin telling my story.

I tell you this today, because I want to encourage you to share your story with your kids, grandkids or if you don’t have children, your nieces and nephews.  I feel certain they will enjoy learning about how things were in your life beginning with your childhood.  I truly wish I had a similar book or document telling about my own parents’ lives!

If writing isn’t your thing, find a book such as The Grandparent Book to prompt you with questions you can answer.  I don’t know if that particular book is still available but I’m guessing if you go online to Amazon or visit a bookstore you can find something similar to assist you with this process.

Yes, it will take you some time to record all the details of your life, but you don’t need to complete it in one sitting.  Take it slowly and work on it when you are inspired and have some time to reflect.  I’m thinking I have a terrible memory and don’t remember things about my childhood; in reality, when I sit and ponder about it, I really do have some things I could share that might be interesting.  I’m sure you do too!

At this holiday time of year, I find myself overcome with nostalgia – more so than any other time of the year.  All the sights, sounds, smells and activities of the season conjure up memories of Christmases past for me.  This in turn can bring a smile to my face, or emotional tears to my eyes.  But regardless if smiles or tears, I have established some holiday traditions just so I can experience that nostalgia.

I love hearing Bing Crosby singing White Christmas on the radio as it brings thoughts of my dad to mind.  He has been gone since 1981, but I remember when I was growing up we had a whole collection of 45 RPM records of Bing Crosby singing Christmas carols , and how my dad loved Bing’s version of those songs.  (If you are too young reading this, you probably don’t even know what 45s are!)

My older sister Bonny, took me to see the movie, White Christmas, when I was about 7 years old, and I loved it; so, re-watching it every year is a tradition I keep, and that too, is a nostalgic activity for me.  The New England ski lodge setting of that movie, seems very appropriate for thoughts of lovely, snowy Christmases, so puts me in a holiday mood.

Another traditional activity during my childhood was making and decorating sugar cut-out cookies each Christmas.  So, I have now included that as a must-do activity with my two grandsons sometime during December.

I don’t know how much longer they will be interested in frosting and decorating cookies, but I am milking it for all it’s worth for now.  It just wouldn’t be Christmas without having a plate of those cookies available to put out for Santa with a glass of milk.  (I don’t really know if the boys put out cookies for Santa, but I’d like to think they do!)

Though I no longer spend hours in December making lots of Christmas cookies and candy, I have not given up on making fudge each year.  First, and foremost, I love the stuff; but, for me, it is another “must-have” to serve for Christmas celebrations, to give as gifts or to enjoy a piece with my Christmas tea.

When I was a kid, my mother would make a variety of cookies and candies, including fudge, to serve throughout the season as  family and friends came to call.  It was always fun to help put together the cookie/candy plate for serving during our family get-togethers on Christmas Eve.  I still enjoy putting together such a plate even though these days, I have far fewer varieties of goodies to put on it.

Here are some other activities I remember from my youth with fondness at this time of year.  Do any of them sound familiar to you?

• having a cup of hot chocolate (and frozen toes) after an afternoon or evening ice-skating on the ice rink at the nearby lake – I no longer ice-skate, but I do indulge in a cup of hot chocolate now and then;
• going through the Christmas ornament box and remembering the story behind each one while decorating the tree;
• writing letters to Santa – making a list of what I hoped to get for presents, and actually mailing it to the North Pole;
• participating in the Sunday School Christmas program – I got to be Mary one year simply because the “quiet” girl in my class who the teacher thought would be perfect for the role, didn’t want to do it and I was bold enough to speak up and say I would do it!

Sometimes the nostalgia experienced at this time of year seems painful – remembering loved ones who are no longer here.  But, maybe instead of being sad, I should be grateful that I have happy memories of my childhood Christmases.

I’d love to hear what traditions you keep during this special season.  If you are so inclined to share, please leave a message below.

Merry Christmas!